








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 471 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 135 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 45 matches | ||
| Faceit | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 41 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2004 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,045 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2426 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1573 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 2860 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 2186 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $943,199 of utility $176 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 81 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JUSTCIK | 64% | 42 |
| #2 | Makwad0R *EssA* | 62% | 26 |
| #3 | Kawiar | 56% | 61 |
| #4 | -v- Sh4dY -v- | 53% | 86 |
| #5 | Katuroshii | 53% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Maciuś ^.^ #AloneWolf | 8 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | -v- Sh4dY -v- | 8 | 0.0044 |
| #3 | Kawiar | 8 | 0.0063 |
| #4 | A-tya-tya | 7 | 0.0032 |
| #5 | Krystyna z Gazowni | 3 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Maciuś ^.^ #AloneWolf | 250 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #2 | Voldem | 246 | 0.32 | 6 min |
| #3 | ISO | 181 | 0.29 | 5 min |
| #4 | Krystyna z Gazowni | 132 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #5 | Kawiar | 115 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Makwad0R *EssA* | +1.71 | 51 | 32 |
| #2 | ISO | +1.61 | 71 | 72 |
| #3 | -v- Sh4dY -v- | +1.44 | 64 | 41 |
| #4 | Voldem | +0.71 | 52 | 64 |
| #5 | →_→Draqu←_← | +0.58 | 61 | 71 |





