








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 27 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1021 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,272 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 656 | 20% |
| Smokes | 625 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 984 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 1007 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $311,457 of utility $144 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 57 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dion | 62% | 26 |
| #2 | George | 59% | 37 |
| #3 | Limus | 57% | 7 |
| #4 | Fig | 56% | 101 |
| #5 | BigJackOnPcVAC | 56% | 59 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | George | 59% | 37 |
| #3 | Limus | 57% | 7 |
| #4 | Fig | 56% | 101 |
| #5 | BigJackOnPcVAC | 56% | 59 |
| #6 | Lewis | 50% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fig | 5 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | BigJackOnPcVAC | 3 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | Lewis | 2 | 0.0059 |
| #4 | George | 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fig | 116 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #2 | BigJackOnPcVAC | 79 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #3 | George | 78 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | Dion | 39 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | Lewis | 12 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fig | +1.92 | 79 | 58 |
| #2 | GMILL | +1.02 | 54 | 63 |
| #3 | George | +0.04 | 63 | 58 |
| #4 | Dion | -0.28 | 61 | 47 |
| #5 | Lewis | -1.52 | 61 | 39 |





