








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 157 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2143 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,653 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 891 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1533 | 42% |
| HE Grenades | 621 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 608 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,038,884 of utility $235 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 216 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Lettuce Play | 46% | 144 |
| #5 | scottyisXTC | 40% | 35 |
| #6 | Cool Ranch Buddha | 36% | 22 |
| #7 | CMurder | 36% | 14 |
| #8 | poog | 29% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CMurder | +3.30 | 73 | 46 |
| #2 | big mama | +2.09 | 51 | 79 |
| #3 | ㊗Frosty㊗ | +1.78 | 73 | 40 |
| #4 | Lettuce Play | +1.40 | 82 | 64 |
| #5 | ✪ Kinky Llama | -0.44 | 65 | 42 |





