








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1201 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 1053 matches | ||
| Faceit | 111 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 41 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




51 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10975 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 47,495 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 14809 | 31% |
| Smokes | 12934 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 9488 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 10264 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,522,051 of utility $59 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 873 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JeePPa | 55% | 98 |
| #2 | Ketsu | 53% | 99 |
| #3 | BananaBomb23 | 50% | 306 |
| #4 | ELpugi | 49% | 239 |
| #5 | Yufa | 49% | 112 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | BananaBomb23 | 50% | 306 |
| #4 | ELpugi | 49% | 239 |
| #5 | Yufa | 49% | 112 |
| #6 | kojeM | 49% | 219 |
| #7 | ug1MMM | 45% | 161 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kojeM | 12 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | ELpugi | 10 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | BananaBomb23 | 8 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | JeePPa | 6 | 0.0029 |
| #5 | ug1MMM | 5 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kojeM | 1152 | 0.26 | 30 min |
| #2 | BananaBomb23 | 712 | 0.11 | 20 min |
| #3 | ug1MMM | 665 | 0.20 | 15 min |
| #4 | ELpugi | 660 | 0.13 | 18 min |
| #5 | Yufa | 390 | 0.17 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BananaBomb23 | +3.69 | 87 | 68 |
| #2 | Ruoska | +0.60 | 69 | 69 |
| #3 | JeePPa | +0.28 | 56 | 72 |
| #4 | ELpugi | +0.18 | 73 | 63 |
| #5 | kojeM | +0.08 | 76 | 64 |





