








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 477 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 84 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Premier | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3529 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,375 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5402 | 31% |
| Smokes | 4573 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 3700 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 3700 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,139,064 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 916 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wither//bloom_longboi | 61% | 28 |
| #2 | a lg bokeγ | 52% | 23 |
| #3 | goku marine ✝☪✡ | 48% | 87 |
| #4 | Count Erstrike | 44% | 176 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wither//bloom_longboi | 61% | 28 |
| #2 | a lg bokeγ | 52% | 23 |
| #3 | goku marine ✝☪✡ | 48% | 87 |
| #4 | Count Erstrike | 44% | 176 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Count Erstrike | 9 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | goku marine ✝☪✡ | 7 | 0.0041 |
| #3 | a lg bokeγ | 2 | 0.0041 |
| #4 | wither//bloom_longboi | 1 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Count Erstrike | 295 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| #2 | goku marine ✝☪✡ | 241 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #3 | a lg bokeγ | 61 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #4 | wither//bloom_longboi | 31 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | a lg bokeγ | +2.07 | 60 | 60 |
| #2 | fenra | +0.70 | 63 | 68 |
| #3 | goku marine ✝☪✡ | -0.31 | 51 | 43 |
| #4 | Count Erstrike | -3.39 | 23 | 46 |
| #5 | wither//bloom_longboi | -3.47 | 4 | 27 |





