








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 811 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 438 matches | ||
| Esplay | 157 matches | 1,629 | |
| Competitive Dust2 | 23 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 40 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5929 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,255 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4236 | 20% |
| Smokes | 6916 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 5562 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 4541 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,501,282 of utility $157 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 466 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | floral_tribute | 56% | 70 |
| #2 | valpacino :) | 53% | 75 |
| #3 | General Kalle | 50% | 58 |
| #4 | TheMonopolyGuy | 47% | 209 |
| #5 | Bolsa | 47% | 96 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | TheMonopolyGuy | 47% | 209 |
| #5 | Bolsa | 47% | 96 |
| #6 | Elnour | 46% | 100 |
| #7 | vaant | 44% | 122 |
| #8 | Folich! | 44% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vaant | 4 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | Elnour | 4 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | Bolsa | 4 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | TheMonopolyGuy | 3 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | valpacino :) | 3 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | valpacino :) | 253 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #2 | TheMonopolyGuy | 171 | 0.04 | 5 min |
| #3 | Bolsa | 129 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #4 | vaant | 122 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #5 | Elnour | 118 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Elnour | +1.51 | 65 | 61 |
| #2 | floral_tribute | +0.92 | 66 | 42 |
| #3 | valpacino :) | +0.18 | 51 | 83 |
| #4 | vaant | -0.03 | 57 | 66 |
| #5 | h0kz. | -0.12 | 50 | 53 |





