








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 53 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




37 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3479 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,914 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1740 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1634 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1952 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1588 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $780,185 of utility $123 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 197 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | John Weak | 63% | 27 |
| #2 | proteus | 61% | 28 |
| #3 | JimmyBurger43 | 53% | 95 |
| #4 | Munchez | 52% | 61 |
| #5 | Reverend B. Gillis | 52% | 225 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pews | 49 | 0.0113 |
| #2 | WorkHorse1981 | 31 | 0.0069 |
| #3 | Reverend B. Gillis | 14 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | Icey | 11 | 0.0222 |
| #5 | JimmyBurger43 | 7 | 0.0037 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pews | 626 | 0.14 | 17 min |
| #2 | Reverend B. Gillis | 252 | 0.05 | 6 min |
| #3 | JimmyBurger43 | 209 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #4 | WorkHorse1981 | 131 | 0.03 | 3 min |
| #5 | Munchez | 130 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | th3rager21 | +3.23 | 86 | 55 |
| #2 | pews | +2.84 | 83 | 55 |
| #3 | proteus | +2.62 | 86 | 47 |
| #4 | John Weak | +1.92 | 74 | 38 |
| #5 | WorkHorse1981 | +1.13 | 62 | 21 |





