








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1249 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 570 matches | ||
| Faceit | 101 matches | ||
| Wingman | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 48 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




44 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8620 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,399 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7594 | 31% |
| Smokes | 5838 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 6226 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 4741 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,406,796 of utility $194 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 547 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Botish | 59% | 71 |
| #2 | F0x3y... | 57% | 256 |
| #3 | BoB | 53% | 115 |
| #4 | Suda | 52% | 84 |
| #5 | ✰ANES Ɑ͞ ̶ ﻝﮞ ♿ FREE INGER | 52% | 62 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ BoB Farlig ✪ | 19 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | F0x3y... | 12 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | KoK | 7 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | Botish | 7 | 0.0045 |
| #5 | BoB | 5 | 0.0020 |





