








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 74 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 66 matches | ||
| Premier | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
712 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,286 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1472 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1401 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1258 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1155 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $215,607 of utility $95 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 14 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bendX | 55% | 40 |
| #2 | ☁Snakehead2_1 | 50% | 10 |
| #3 | JJ_Easter | 48% | 60 |
| #4 | Tim112 | 46% | 37 |
| #5 | JayEx | 44% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Fandbotjay | 44% | 87 |
| #8 | DJ Trexx | 41% | 17 |
| #9 | sMoG | 37% | 27 |
| #10 | Padenko | 22% | 9 |
| #11 | aqrcN | 20% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fandbotjay | 5 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | JJ_Easter | 2 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | bendX | 2 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | DJ Trexx | 2 | 0.0055 |
| #5 | KAPAKEN | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fandbotjay | 171 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #2 | KAPAKEN | 137 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #3 | Tim112 | 74 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #4 | JJ_Easter | 49 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #5 | DJ Trexx | 49 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☁Snakehead2_1 | +3.53 | 52 | 71 |
| #2 | bendX | +2.37 | 83 | 58 |
| #3 | Padenko | +2.05 | 41 | 58 |
| #4 | Fandbotjay | +1.82 | 48 | 61 |
| #5 | sMoG | +1.61 | 79 | 52 |





