








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1217 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 539 matches | ||
| Faceit | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 75 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5374 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,025 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6248 | 28% |
| Smokes | 5349 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 5224 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 5204 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,786,188 of utility $203 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 490 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | daybaron | 70% | 43 |
| #2 | Virtual War Crimes | 58% | 73 |
| #3 | skosgo | 55% | 204 |
| #4 | Dovy | 51% | 279 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | daybaron | 70% | 43 |
| #2 | Virtual War Crimes | 58% | 73 |
| #3 | skosgo | 55% | 204 |
| #4 | Dovy | 51% | 279 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | skosgo | 14 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | Virtual War Crimes | 5 | 0.0033 |
| #3 | Dovy | 4 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dovy | 1232 | 0.20 | 34 min |
| #2 | skosgo | 798 | 0.18 | 20 min |
| #3 | Virtual War Crimes | 153 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #4 | daybaron | 61 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | olifur | +1.51 | 63 | 64 |
| #2 | daybaron | +1.32 | 73 | 44 |
| #3 | skosgo | +0.32 | 72 | 59 |
| #4 | Dovy | -0.38 | 61 | 61 |
| #5 | Virtual War Crimes | -2.67 | 35 | 49 |





