








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 493 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 133 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 32 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3412 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,171 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3533 | 32% |
| Smokes | 2935 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2147 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 2556 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $696,226 of utility $105 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 37 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RevaN | 54% | 39 |
| #2 | LTLMX | 53% | 159 |
| #3 | YMCA BigDaddyCraddy | 53% | 17 |
| #4 | Hazz517 | 53% | 156 |
| #5 | kz_hayd | 52% | 69 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LTLMX | 14 | 0.0043 |
| #2 | Hazz517 | 5 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | Ashbash | 5 | 0.0041 |
| #4 | CrispE | 5 | 0.0103 |
| #5 | Sir BarBosh | 4 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hazz517 | 1082 | 0.33 | 25 min |
| #2 | Sir BarBosh | 595 | 0.24 | 14 min |
| #3 | LTLMX | 455 | 0.14 | 13 min |
| #4 | Ashbash | 130 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #5 | kz_hayd | 115 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Stanley | +2.96 | 75 | 63 |
| #2 | CrispE | +2.53 | 84 | 44 |
| #3 | Ashbash | +1.20 | 71 | 61 |
| #4 | Hazz517 | +0.54 | 75 | 70 |
| #5 | LTLMX | +0.51 | 68 | 53 |





