








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 836 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 248 matches | ||
| Faceit | 128 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3684 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,293 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7171 | 34% |
| Smokes | 3829 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 4932 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 5361 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $948,277 of utility $95 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 814 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rane | 51% | 395 |
| #2 | JUGI | 50% | 175 |
| #3 | Jerben | 50% | 34 |
| #4 | kannu | 50% | 381 |
| #5 | veetee | 50% | 313 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | kannu | 50% | 381 |
| #5 | veetee | 50% | 313 |
| #6 | kane1 | 49% | 95 |
| #7 | gaeL | 49% | 119 |
| #8 | säkki | 49% | 208 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | veetee | 25 | 0.0038 |
| #2 | kannu | 10 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | rane | 7 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | JUGI | 4 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | kane1 | 4 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kannu | 1862 | 0.23 | 57 min |
| #2 | veetee | 765 | 0.12 | 24 min |
| #3 | JUGI | 583 | 0.16 | 16 min |
| #4 | rane | 560 | 0.07 | 18 min |
| #5 | gaeL | 305 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kannu | +1.82 | 73 | 75 |
| #2 | JUGI | +0.79 | 67 | 60 |
| #3 | kane1 | +0.20 | 71 | 56 |
| #4 | jussi | -0.25 | 48 | 67 |
| #5 | gaeL | -0.38 | 77 | 53 |





