








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 360 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Renown | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1282 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,590 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 889 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1410 | 39% |
| HE Grenades | 397 | 11% |
| Molotovs | 894 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $428,689 of utility $175 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 328 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bongi | 5 | 0.0054 |
| #2 | burst | 2 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | ⎛⎝Cerkaz⎠⎞ | 2 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | Phancho | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | álf | 1 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | burst | 151 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #2 | bongi | 84 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #3 | Phancho | 48 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #4 | álf | 40 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | Specific | 36 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JeppeMBL | +2.75 | 55 | 53 |
| #2 | bongi | +1.39 | 46 | 60 |
| #3 | burst | +0.42 | 55 | 61 |
| #4 | ⎛⎝Cerkaz⎠⎞ | +0.12 | 37 | 41 |
| #5 | Specific | -0.74 | 59 | 60 |





