








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1080 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 404 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 40 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4710 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,618 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1794 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1048 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 1895 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1881 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,757,187 of utility $170 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 684 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hellomoto | 60% | 30 |
| #2 | teebs | 55% | 171 |
| #3 | i flame za1N | 55% | 198 |
| #4 | petersung | 53% | 399 |
| #5 | za1N | 53% | 422 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | i flame za1N | 55% | 198 |
| #4 | petersung | 53% | 399 |
| #5 | za1N | 53% | 422 |
| #6 | euihyuN | 53% | 95 |
| #7 | HECTIC | 52% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | petersung | 16 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | za1N | 14 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | euihyuN | 7 | 0.0034 |
| #4 | i flame za1N | 4 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | teebs | 3 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | petersung | 1863 | 0.22 | 51 min |
| #2 | za1N | 937 | 0.10 | 22 min |
| #3 | teebs | 832 | 0.23 | 22 min |
| #4 | i flame za1N | 323 | 0.08 | 9 min |
| #5 | euihyuN | 126 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hellomoto | +2.45 | 75 | 60 |
| #2 | CW | +1.20 | 92 | 47 |
| #3 | euihyuN | +0.95 | 79 | 66 |
| #4 | teebs | +0.69 | 51 | 71 |
| #5 | petersung | +0.47 | 68 | 70 |





