








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 702 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 260 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Faceit | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 41 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3603 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,816 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2156 | 18% |
| Smokes | 4554 | 39% |
| HE Grenades | 2456 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2650 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,159,404 of utility $159 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SteDarN- | 61% | 23 |
| #2 | ♛ v0gga ♛ | 58% | 19 |
| #3 | Danne | 57% | 82 |
| #4 | `cuRRe- | 56% | 18 |
| #5 | Megaman | 54% | 120 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | straum | 375 | 0.05 | 12 min |
| #2 | SWEbro Alis | 164 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| #3 | Megaman | 150 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #4 | Danne | 74 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #5 | SteDarN- | 48 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SteDarN- | +3.49 | 57 | 68 |
| #2 | ✪ Tom | +2.92 | 71 | 69 |
| #3 | straum | +1.36 | 74 | 66 |
| #4 | Megaman | -0.17 | 63 | 53 |
| #5 | Willy klonka | -1.00 | 46 | 50 |





