








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 62 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 29 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
484 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,299 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 871 | 26% |
| Smokes | 811 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 867 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 750 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $94,053 of utility $63 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 16 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | slipszi | 75% | 4 |
| #2 | BOT_nyitoC | 59% | 27 |
| #3 | trebroN | 57% | 14 |
| #4 | Renci | 55% | 11 |
| #5 | skorzeny | 47% | 49 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | BOT_nyitoC | 59% | 27 |
| #3 | trebroN | 57% | 14 |
| #4 | Renci | 55% | 11 |
| #5 | skorzeny | 47% | 49 |
| #6 | ♿ daweee | 38% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | skorzeny | 8 | 0.0076 |
| #2 | trebroN | 3 | 0.0093 |
| #3 | Renci | 1 | 0.0039 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | skorzeny | 102 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #2 | BOT_nyitoC | 75 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #3 | trebroN | 57 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #4 | Renci | 44 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| #5 | ♿ daweee | 39 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | slipszi | +4.05 | 79 | 77 |
| #2 | BOT_nyitoC | +3.13 | 67 | 75 |
| #3 | Renci | +1.24 | 64 | 74 |
| #4 | trebroN | -0.03 | 55 | 70 |
| #5 | skorzeny | -0.97 | 63 | 57 |





