








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 265 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 111 matches | ||
| Faceit | 42 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




56 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2099 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,008 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1423 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1704 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1520 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1361 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $671,436 of utility $160 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 314 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ★Gusse★ | 60% | 30 |
| #2 | problem | 58% | 36 |
| #3 | AndersPagter | 55% | 119 |
| #4 | Alko Martin | 55% | 174 |
| #5 | Kulde | 53% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Henning | +1.72 | 71 | 68 |
| #2 | ★Gusse★ | +1.48 | 77 | 74 |
| #3 | Alko Martin | +1.16 | 76 | 71 |
| #4 | Kulde | +1.11 | 85 | 66 |
| #5 | problem | +1.02 | 85 | 69 |





