








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 391 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 238 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 52 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2377 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,291 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 963 | 15% |
| Smokes | 1496 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 2306 | 37% |
| Molotovs | 1526 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $830,628 of utility $141 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 322 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WHABEEB | 61% | 72 |
| #2 | Mr. Wabbit | 60% | 109 |
| #3 | Banter | 53% | 58 |
| #4 | Stew1e3k (스튜) | 52% | 23 |
| #5 | Midnight Bum Tickler | 48% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Banter | 53% | 58 |
| #4 | Stew1e3k (스튜) | 52% | 23 |
| #5 | Midnight Bum Tickler | 48% | 33 |
| #6 | Jinx | 46% | 26 |
| #7 | Mr Killy Wiggles | 44% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr. Wabbit | 6 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | Banter | 6 | 0.0051 |
| #3 | WHABEEB | 4 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | Mr Killy Wiggles | 2 | 0.0034 |
| #5 | Jinx | 2 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr. Wabbit | 330 | 0.15 | 9 min |
| #2 | Banter | 183 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #3 | Stew1e3k (스튜) | 141 | 0.29 | 3 min |
| #4 | Mr Killy Wiggles | 102 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #5 | WHABEEB | 67 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Banter | +0.67 | 59 | 72 |
| #2 | Mr. Wabbit | +0.55 | 71 | 69 |
| #3 | Jinx | +0.19 | 84 | 38 |
| #4 | 999 | +0.08 | 69 | 51 |
| #5 | WHABEEB | -0.01 | 72 | 45 |





