








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 227 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 64 matches | ||
| Premier | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1738 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,935 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1806 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1708 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1825 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1596 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $461,951 of utility $123 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 295 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Perry Da PlaTtypus | 79% | 14 |
| #2 | LightStrike | 66% | 32 |
| #3 | Ive. | 65% | 23 |
| #4 | K0Mski | 65% | 20 |
| #5 | Sir Floyd The Breathless | 64% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gary | 15 | 0.0232 |
| #2 | UnoTwoTresFour | 8 | 0.0102 |
| #3 | C0br4 | 5 | 0.0080 |
| #4 | Sir Floyd The Breathless | 4 | 0.0169 |
| #5 | LightStrike | 3 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | C0br4 | 255 | 0.41 | 6 min |
| #2 | Gary | 174 | 0.27 | 4 min |
| #3 | UnoTwoTresFour | 154 | 0.20 | 3 min |
| #4 | Boogeyman | 117 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #5 | Sir Floyd The Breathless | 84 | 0.36 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | C0br4 | +4.57 | 79 | 76 |
| #2 | LightStrike | +2.89 | 71 | 48 |
| #3 | Sir Floyd The Breathless | +2.47 | 79 | 66 |
| #4 | qb | +1.26 | 74 | 57 |
| #5 | K0Mski | +1.04 | 73 | 38 |





