








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 52 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 73 matches | ||
| Faceit | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1610 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,763 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2731 | 31% |
| Smokes | 2150 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1611 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2271 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $287,428 of utility $74 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 108 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kSwitch | 69% | 48 |
| #2 | Nate. | 68% | 22 |
| #3 | fREAKNiK | 64% | 70 |
| #4 | MnH | 62% | 63 |
| #5 | XXX | 61% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | XXX | 3 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | Puushu | 3 | 0.0051 |
| #3 | fREAKNiK | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | MnH | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | kSwitch | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kSwitch | 233 | 0.23 | 5 min |
| #2 | fREAKNiK | 149 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #3 | MnH | 120 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #4 | XXX | 118 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #5 | Puushu | 112 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nate. | +4.27 | 77 | 57 |
| #2 | kSwitch | +2.81 | 66 | 75 |
| #3 | fREAKNiK | +2.03 | 87 | 47 |
| #4 | XXX | +0.63 | 74 | 63 |
| #5 | MnH | +0.56 | 76 | 53 |





