








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 116 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 113 matches | ||
| Wingman | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




38 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1338 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,160 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2010 | 39% |
| Smokes | 878 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 757 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 1515 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $338,533 of utility $75 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 20 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Light | 55% | 29 |
| #2 | ➤ttv.Kieran6Spdm | 49% | 61 |
| #3 | kochi | 48% | 27 |
| #4 | service | 47% | 87 |
| #5 | Z1 Alpha | 44% | 62 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | kochi | 48% | 27 |
| #4 | service | 47% | 87 |
| #5 | Z1 Alpha | 44% | 62 |
| #6 | da | 37% | 38 |
| #7 | Swæf | 31% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | service | 10 | 0.0064 |
| #2 | kochi | 9 | 0.0184 |
| #3 | Z1 Alpha | 5 | 0.0043 |
| #4 | Light | 5 | 0.0084 |
| #5 | Swæf | 2 | 0.0067 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Z1 Alpha | 69 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #2 | ➤ttv.Kieran6Spdm | 67 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #3 | kochi | 57 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #4 | da | 43 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | service | 32 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Z1 Alpha | +3.34 | 81 | 49 |
| #2 | service | +1.53 | 66 | 45 |
| #3 | ➤ttv.Kieran6Spdm | +1.29 | 66 | 40 |
| #4 | da | +0.36 | 63 | 52 |
| #5 | (6.5) Angel ^_^ | -0.37 | 71 | 52 |





