








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 724 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 473 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 82 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6571 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 32,947 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8766 | 27% |
| Smokes | 9463 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 7891 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 6827 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $921,354 of utility $63 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1322 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CoreRed | 56% | 43 |
| #2 | Dito | 54% | 102 |
| #3 | Matt | 52% | 46 |
| #4 | vzo | 51% | 71 |
| #5 | Nocreativity420 | 50% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | Linrono | 44% | 80 |
| #12 | BostonCider | 43% | 53 |
| #13 | Eyzoroth | 43% | 72 |
| #14 | Whaty | 41% | 114 |
| #15 | dolli | 40% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ColtonAce | 12 | 0.0046 |
| #2 | Cadenbear | 6 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | Linrono | 4 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | `Light <3 | 4 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | Eyzoroth | 4 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ColtonAce | 311 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #2 | `Light <3 | 250 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #3 | Cadenbear | 247 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #4 | Linrono | 246 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #5 | vzo | 199 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CoreRed | +2.97 | 68 | 74 |
| #2 | vzo | +2.27 | 79 | 67 |
| #3 | Chewtoy | +1.22 | 59 | 68 |
| #4 | dolli | +0.70 | 73 | 70 |
| #5 | `Light <3 | -0.14 | 61 | 69 |





