








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 713 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 452 matches | ||
| Esplay | 30 matches | 2,128 | |
| Competitive Inferno | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 19 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Renown | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 50 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




32 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8054 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 25,972 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7681 | 30% |
| Smokes | 4699 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 7154 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 6438 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,101,469 of utility $86 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 707 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | furu | 63% | 123 |
| #2 | LACKEMO | 63% | 32 |
| #3 | Slimen | 56% | 357 |
| #4 | Jörgen | 53% | 58 |
| #5 | EpiQa | 53% | 130 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Slimen | 1754 | 0.24 | 48 min |
| #2 | EpiQa | 408 | 0.15 | 10 min |
| #3 | furu | 318 | 0.12 | 10 min |
| #4 | fadee | 284 | 0.04 | 7 min |
| #5 | LACKEMO | 203 | 0.30 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | maNex | +2.78 | 85 | 71 |
| #2 | Slimen | +2.50 | 88 | 82 |
| #3 | LACKEMO | +1.55 | 79 | 86 |
| #4 | Jörgen | +0.22 | 87 | 66 |
| #5 | furu | -0.49 | 74 | 69 |





