








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 550 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 282 matches | ||
| Wingman | 31 matches | ||
| Faceit | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 31 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




53 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3968 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,392 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5015 | 33% |
| Smokes | 3542 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 3777 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 3058 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $847,495 of utility $101 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 398 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xCHEFy0 | 61% | 54 |
| #2 | marius | 60% | 58 |
| #3 | salumilord_Ace G | 54% | 94 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xCHEFy0 | 61% | 54 |
| #2 | marius | 60% | 58 |
| #3 | salumilord_Ace G | 54% | 94 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | salumilord_Ace G | 9 | 0.0045 |
| #2 | marius | 4 | 0.0034 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | marius | 364 | 0.31 | 10 min |
| #2 | salumilord_Ace G | 177 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #3 | xCHEFy0 | 119 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xCHEFy0 | +2.36 | 78 | 62 |
| #2 | Spauld1ng *climbLOUNGE | +1.88 | 81 | 65 |
| #3 | marius | -1.27 | 79 | 80 |
| #4 | salumilord_Ace G | -2.55 | 40 | 58 |





