








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 568 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 150 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2523 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,348 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1614 | 16% |
| Smokes | 3182 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 2533 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 3019 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,010,082 of utility $168 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 494 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Morghulis | 47% | 17 |
| #8 | ✪ Stefelele ✖仲間 | 47% | 79 |
| #9 | schmandperle | 45% | 33 |
| #10 | JB | 45% | 44 |
| #11 | Nerexis | 44% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Param3d1c | 795 | 0.17 | 24 min |
| #2 | ✪ Stefelele ✖仲間 | 226 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #3 | JB | 118 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #4 | Elliminator | 101 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #5 | McPeace | 74 | 0.22 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Param3d1c | +2.05 | 68 | 68 |
| #2 | ✪ Stefelele ✖仲間 | +1.86 | 78 | 68 |
| #3 | SlμmpιLμmpι | +1.37 | 64 | 54 |
| #4 | Par0dy0faPr0 | +1.14 | 57 | 66 |
| #5 | McPeace | +0.57 | 71 | 71 |





