








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1424 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 353 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Esplay | 2 matches | 1,857 | |
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 27 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4082 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,889 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3103 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2837 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2259 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2690 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,323,112 of utility $265 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 143 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⛧ ☠︎ The_Darkness ☠ ⛧ | 67% | 21 |
| #2 | .s | 66% | 56 |
| #3 | BnA - Mad CookieZ | 63% | 32 |
| #4 | Soulthy | 60% | 25 |
| #5 | y0nE1337t0 | 60% | 95 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Thu | 48% | 23 |
| #11 | AmNest1C | 48% | 46 |
| #12 | bRUNOBANANI (it's a name) | 48% | 44 |
| #13 | Skumleli | 43% | 23 |
| #14 | SJUR | 42% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⛧ ☠︎ The_Darkness ☠ ⛧ | 5 | 0.0110 |
| #2 | dramatiK! 侍 | 4 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | AmNest1C | 4 | 0.0040 |
| #4 | Soulthy | 3 | 0.0060 |
| #5 | TتmmyMAn☭ | 2 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dramatiK! 侍 | 346 | 0.12 | 10 min |
| #2 | .s | 308 | 0.27 | 8 min |
| #3 | Gatsby | 264 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #4 | TتmmyMAn☭ | 145 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #5 | ⛧ ☠︎ The_Darkness ☠ ⛧ | 119 | 0.26 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Thu | +3.55 | 81 | 52 |
| #2 | bRUNOBANANI (it's a name) | +2.22 | 59 | 48 |
| #3 | AmNest1C | +2.09 | 87 | 38 |
| #4 | Soulthy | +0.96 | 75 | 56 |
| #5 | dramatiK! 侍 | +0.95 | 79 | 71 |





