








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 121 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 475 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Esplay | 2 matches | 1,340 | |
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3128 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,530 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7494 | 38% |
| Smokes | 4358 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 4574 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 3104 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,527,383 of utility $113 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 110 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Majvor | 46% | 393 |
| #10 | Bobo | 46% | 107 |
| #11 | KilllingBoy | 44% | 55 |
| #12 | h4nkstah | 43% | 194 |
| #13 | Clerasil | 41% | 58 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bengt-Göran | 12 | 0.0038 |
| #2 | TaragoN | 10 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | Majvor | 9 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | Bobo | 6 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | KilllingBoy | 5 | 0.0048 |





