








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 351 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




36 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1984 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,954 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 878 | 30% |
| Smokes | 829 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 496 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 751 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $633,062 of utility $180 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 52 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [lomborgini] swoo:Pthenoob | 53% | 74 |
| #2 | Tea4Dragons | 51% | 72 |
| #3 | Angelo | 49% | 68 |
| #4 | TKMachine | 46% | 13 |
| #5 | Albatross | 45% | 47 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Angelo | 11 | 0.0082 |
| #2 | [lomborgini] swoo:Pthenoob | 10 | 0.0068 |
| #3 | Tea4Dragons | 6 | 0.0042 |
| #4 | Min | 4 | 0.0053 |
| #5 | Daril | 3 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Angelo | 199 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #2 | Albatross | 157 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #3 | Min | 92 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #4 | Tea4Dragons | 90 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | [lomborgini] swoo:Pthenoob | 29 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Angelo | +2.68 | 61 | 52 |
| #2 | BaRt | +2.21 | 67 | 38 |
| #3 | Tea4Dragons | +1.70 | 50 | 54 |
| #4 | [lomborgini] swoo:Pthenoob | +0.43 | 59 | 35 |
| #5 | Min | -0.08 | 74 | 37 |





