










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 195 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 165 matches | ||
| Wingman | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Renown | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 60 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2498 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,808 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1920 | 22% |
| Smokes | 2589 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2077 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2222 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $945,419 of utility $173 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 81 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RIP Rùdriguéz Barbâroux | 51% | 116 |
| #2 | NOT Jonas Vingegaard | 47% | 264 |
| #3 | therealpringlessourcream | 46% | 136 |
| #4 | Ammi Pierce | 43% | 136 |
| #5 | Waschbecken5000PLUS | 43% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RIP Rùdriguéz Barbâroux | 51% | 116 |
| #2 | NOT Jonas Vingegaard | 47% | 264 |
| #3 | therealpringlessourcream | 46% | 136 |
| #4 | Ammi Pierce | 43% | 136 |
| #5 | Waschbecken5000PLUS | 43% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NOT Jonas Vingegaard | 8 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | therealpringlessourcream | 4 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | Ammi Pierce | 3 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | RIP Rùdriguéz Barbâroux | 3 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | therealpringlessourcream | 327 | 0.12 | 9 min |
| #2 | NOT Jonas Vingegaard | 101 | 0.02 | 3 min |
| #3 | RIP Rùdriguéz Barbâroux | 83 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #4 | Waschbecken5000PLUS | 53 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #5 | Ammi Pierce | 41 | 0.01 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chazor | +1.70 | 55 | 63 |
| #2 | NOT Jonas Vingegaard | +1.28 | 74 | 34 |
| #3 | therealpringlessourcream | +0.46 | 48 | 68 |
| #4 | RIP Rùdriguéz Barbâroux | -1.57 | 50 | 43 |
| #5 | Waschbecken5000PLUS | -3.11 | 54 | 47 |





