








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 79 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 86 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




95 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1280 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,253 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 298 | 13% |
| Smokes | 583 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 434 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 938 | 42% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,194,250 of utility $250 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 101 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr. Smoke | 39 | 0.0094 |
| #2 | ranger rick | 39 | 0.0108 |
| #3 | Ball Gurgler | 21 | 0.0106 |
| #4 | LeBoner | 9 | 0.0092 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr. Smoke | +4.73 | 88 | 67 |
| #2 | Ball Gurgler | +3.10 | 78 | 57 |
| #3 | ranger rick | +2.36 | 86 | 60 |
| #4 | Bill Nye The Vagina Guy | -2.97 | 58 | 24 |
| #5 | LeBoner | -4.60 | 56 | 22 |





