








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 350 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 303 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 184 matches | ||
| Faceit | 34 matches | ||
| Wingman | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4403 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,131 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3185 | 14% |
| Smokes | 4955 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 6967 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 7024 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $559,161 of utility $42 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 82 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kapper :-P | 45% | 60 |
| #2 | Nuttenut | 40% | 136 |
| #3 | Bo1ns | 39% | 221 |
| #4 | twinsdad_DK | 37% | 41 |
| #5 | Phineas | 34% | 92 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kapper :-P | 45% | 60 |
| #2 | Nuttenut | 40% | 136 |
| #3 | Bo1ns | 39% | 221 |
| #4 | twinsdad_DK | 37% | 41 |
| #5 | Phineas | 34% | 92 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bo1ns | 11 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | Nuttenut | 6 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | kapper :-P | 6 | 0.0049 |
| #4 | Phineas | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #5 | twinsdad_DK | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bo1ns | 419 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #2 | Nuttenut | 241 | 0.09 | 9 min |
| #3 | Phineas | 191 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #4 | kapper :-P | 26 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| #5 | twinsdad_DK | 16 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bo1ns | +1.51 | 49 | 61 |
| #2 | twinsdad_DK | +1.06 | 48 | 29 |
| #3 | Pewpew^^ I CAN^T HIT | +0.60 | 30 | 55 |
| #4 | kapper :-P | -3.11 | 16 | 31 |
| #5 | Nuttenut | -3.44 | 21 | 50 |





