








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 462 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
897 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,503 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1349 | 54% |
| Smokes | 469 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 149 | 6% |
| Molotovs | 536 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $205,677 of utility $153 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 31 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RAUN5M3D | 100% | 4 |
| #2 | Klunkedasker | 63% | 16 |
| #3 | Mathais | 61% | 36 |
| #4 | Jens | 60% | 60 |
| #5 | E. Rex Sean | 59% | 59 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Klunkedasker | 63% | 16 |
| #3 | Mathais | 61% | 36 |
| #4 | Jens | 60% | 60 |
| #5 | E. Rex Sean | 59% | 59 |
| #6 | perkele vittu | 50% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mathais | 3 | 0.0041 |
| #2 | Jens | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | E. Rex Sean | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jens | 220 | 0.18 | 6 min |
| #2 | E. Rex Sean | 209 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #3 | Klunkedasker | 61 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #4 | Mathais | 36 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | RAUN5M3D | 26 | 0.27 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | awawawawa | +4.26 | 75 | 64 |
| #2 | Jens | +3.78 | 82 | 68 |
| #3 | Klunkedasker | +3.00 | 82 | 60 |
| #4 | perkele vittu | -0.71 | 68 | 55 |
| #5 | E. Rex Sean | -1.89 | 70 | 50 |





