








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 502 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 97 matches | ||
| Premier | 81 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 75 matches | ||
| Wingman | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 23 different maps





Our logs show 63 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




86 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6550 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,511 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2722 | 22% |
| Smokes | 3324 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 3366 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 3099 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,123,070 of utility $93 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 661 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Weeraz | 54% | 147 |
| #7 | = Jenna = | 54% | 132 |
| #8 | PHX-MrKurt | 53% | 163 |
| #9 | Cronos | 51% | 73 |
| #10 | ZayDrus | 49% | 70 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Weeraz | 36 | 0.0121 |
| #2 | OwlMan | 11 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | PHX-MrKurt | 10 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | ZayDrus | 8 | 0.0056 |
| #5 | = Jenna = | 6 | 0.0023 |





