








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 232 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 74 matches | ||
| Faceit | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1521 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,062 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1765 | 29% |
| Smokes | 1525 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1485 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1287 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $416,563 of utility $129 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 217 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -=NEG@O_DO_HEAD$HOT=- | 67% | 9 |
| #2 | PH | 63% | 32 |
| #3 | Cyclops* -csro- | 60% | 10 |
| #4 | Leonardo🗿🍷 | 59% | 39 |
| #5 | B E R G <pvh> | 53% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | EagleCookie | 51% | 81 |
| #8 | 𝐋𝐋𝟳 | 50% | 12 |
| #9 | ƘɑƒҽԵՏ | 46% | 46 |
| #10 | Dr. Paulo Minoso | 44% | 9 |
| #11 | Jhon94 | 44% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gett2k | 5 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | EagleCookie | 3 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | Jhon94 | 3 | 0.0089 |
| #4 | Dr. Paulo Minoso | 2 | 0.0118 |
| #5 | PH | 1 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gett2k | 527 | 0.29 | 13 min |
| #2 | EagleCookie | 428 | 0.24 | 13 min |
| #3 | Leonardo🗿🍷 | 222 | 0.29 | 6 min |
| #4 | PH | 123 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #5 | ƘɑƒҽԵՏ | 88 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dr. Paulo Minoso | +4.32 | 68 | 59 |
| #2 | PH | +3.65 | 75 | 64 |
| #3 | -=NEG@O_DO_HEAD$HOT=- | +2.82 | 67 | 62 |
| #4 | 𝐋𝐋𝟳 | +2.38 | 76 | 76 |
| #5 | gett2k | +1.46 | 57 | 76 |





