








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 11 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1259 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,216 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1231 | 20% |
| Smokes | 1157 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 2216 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 1612 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $401,012 of utility $94 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 20 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | No Consent | 45% | 131 |
| #2 | raz | 40% | 97 |
| #3 | Mr consent ;) | 26% | 35 |
| #4 | yekoms | 21% | 14 |
| #5 | OpTic_SeXxXuAL_PreDaToR | 21% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | No Consent | 45% | 131 |
| #2 | raz | 40% | 97 |
| #3 | Mr consent ;) | 26% | 35 |
| #4 | yekoms | 21% | 14 |
| #5 | OpTic_SeXxXuAL_PreDaToR | 21% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | No Consent | 13 | 0.0051 |
| #2 | raz | 6 | 0.0033 |
| #3 | Mr consent ;) | 4 | 0.0060 |
| #4 | OpTic_SeXxXuAL_PreDaToR | 3 | 0.0053 |
| #5 | yekoms | 1 | 0.0034 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | No Consent | 303 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #2 | raz | 208 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #3 | Mr consent ;) | 80 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #4 | OpTic_SeXxXuAL_PreDaToR | 75 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #5 | yekoms | 39 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | raz | +5.43 | 79 | 57 |
| #2 | No Consent | +3.56 | 85 | 48 |
| #3 | yekoms | +1.79 | 82 | 63 |
| #4 | JP aka GolfLORD | -2.59 | 49 | 53 |
| #5 | OpTic_SeXxXuAL_PreDaToR | -2.80 | 40 | 48 |





