








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 428 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 229 matches | ||
| Faceit | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 30 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3436 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,613 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3139 | 27% |
| Smokes | 3953 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 1781 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 2740 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,272,696 of utility $160 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 179 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pufflezão | 64% | 22 |
| #2 | lansky | 54% | 101 |
| #3 | Hoothly TTV | 54% | 241 |
| #4 | kbk | 51% | 310 |
| #5 | purple_penguin | 49% | 221 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kbk | 1665 | 0.26 | 53 min |
| #2 | purple_penguin | 507 | 0.11 | 13 min |
| #3 | Hoothly TTV | 280 | 0.06 | 7 min |
| #4 | lansky | 228 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #5 | weeble ツ | 75 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hoothly TTV | +2.49 | 82 | 57 |
| #2 | kbk | +1.70 | 74 | 74 |
| #3 | st3viray | +0.58 | 77 | 61 |
| #4 | Pufflezão | -0.31 | 61 | 56 |
| #5 | purple_penguin | -1.85 | 59 | 58 |





