








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 821 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 266 matches | ||
| Faceit | 164 matches | ||
| Premier | 98 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 69 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5822 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 32,201 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 13879 | 43% |
| Smokes | 7741 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 4545 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 6036 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $427,175 of utility $39 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 487 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Roqu | 70% | 53 |
| #2 | Z33CUSfin | 68% | 62 |
| #3 | VΓ€lil osuu vΓ€lil ei (Jeru) | 62% | 34 |
| #4 | ALuHaRD | 59% | 44 |
| #5 | Korvamato | 58% | 99 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | super novice | 6 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | kaosrat | 6 | 0.0034 |
| #3 | BΓPIS | 3 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | π
πΈπΏ J2k | 3 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | Z33CUSfin | 3 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | π
πΈπΏ J2k | 812 | 0.23 | 21 min |
| #2 | BΓPIS | 449 | 0.12 | 11 min |
| #3 | Z33CUSfin | 436 | 0.32 | 11 min |
| #4 | Roqu | 302 | 0.26 | 6 min |
| #5 | super novice | 256 | 0.05 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dede | +3.03 | 78 | 77 |
| #2 | Roqu | +2.66 | 46 | 71 |
| #3 | =( | +1.44 | 50 | 75 |
| #4 | π
πΈπΏ J2k | +1.36 | 63 | 75 |
| #5 | BΓPIS | +0.91 | 68 | 63 |





