










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 25 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 6 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
72 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 350 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 136 | 39% |
| Smokes | 66 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 81 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 67 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $24,171 of utility $136 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 31 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Blou1s | 67% | 3 |
| #2 | Legacyy | 57% | 7 |
| #3 | Pancakes | 50% | 2 |
| #4 | Spammy | 50% | 2 |
| #5 | Durny | 43% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Pancakes | 50% | 2 |
| #4 | Spammy | 50% | 2 |
| #5 | Durny | 43% | 7 |
| #6 | WillBareSick | 33% | 6 |
| #7 | Pog | 20% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Durny | 4 | 0.0313 |
| #2 | Legacyy | 1 | 0.0069 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Durny | 26 | 0.20 | 1 min |
| #2 | Pog | 22 | 0.23 | 0 min |
| #3 | Legacyy | 19 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #4 | Blou1s | 11 | 0.19 | 0 min |
| #5 | WillBareSick | 9 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Spammy | +4.16 | 88 | 74 |
| #2 | Pog | +2.81 | 97 | 57 |
| #3 | Pancakes | +1.78 | 79 | 37 |
| #4 | Blou1s | +1.73 | 91 | 70 |
| #5 | Durny | +0.26 | 92 | 42 |





