








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 404 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 46 matches | ||
| Premier | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
913 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,785 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 798 | 29% |
| Smokes | 772 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 523 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 692 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $384,544 of utility $234 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 524 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WillBareSick | 67% | 6 |
| #2 | Legacyy | 57% | 14 |
| #3 | Pog | 56% | 25 |
| #4 | Durny | 52% | 21 |
| #5 | Fred | 50% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Legacyy | 57% | 14 |
| #3 | Pog | 56% | 25 |
| #4 | Durny | 52% | 21 |
| #5 | Fred | 50% | 6 |
| #6 | ^0^ | 33% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Durny | 5 | 0.0101 |
| #2 | Pog | 4 | 0.0070 |
| #3 | Legacyy | 1 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | Fred | 1 | 0.0076 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pog | 107 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| #2 | Durny | 63 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #3 | Legacyy | 34 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #4 | ^0^ | 21 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #5 | Fred | 20 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Blou1s | +1.80 | 91 | 67 |
| #2 | Legacyy | +1.37 | 71 | 53 |
| #3 | Durny | +0.31 | 80 | 53 |
| #4 | ^0^ | +0.18 | 80 | 54 |
| #5 | Pog | -0.78 | 71 | 63 |





