








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 288 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 90 matches | ||
| Faceit | 73 matches | ||
| Premier | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1662 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,543 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3482 | 30% |
| Smokes | 2978 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2994 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 2089 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $498,092 of utility $90 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 338 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Poeka | 58% | 26 |
| #2 | KillerMasa | 56% | 43 |
| #3 | Mil | 55% | 22 |
| #4 | Progepanda | 54% | 48 |
| #5 | MyrkkyPena | 53% | 59 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | mutsku | 41% | 117 |
| #10 | MisterE | 40% | 20 |
| #11 | nuori jeesus | 38% | 24 |
| #12 | SMUPPE. | 37% | 19 |
| #13 | Piiska-Pirjo | 29% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mutsku | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #2 | Dille | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | MyrkkyPena | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | Piiska-Pirjo | 1 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MyrkkyPena | 325 | 0.25 | 9 min |
| #2 | mutsku | 245 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #3 | KillerMasa | 197 | 0.21 | 6 min |
| #4 | Mil | 103 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| #5 | Dille | 100 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KillerMasa | +2.28 | 79 | 75 |
| #2 | SMUPPE. | +1.73 | 58 | 73 |
| #3 | Mil | +1.65 | 61 | 68 |
| #4 | Progepanda | +1.06 | 70 | 73 |
| #5 | Alfa 187 | +0.10 | 59 | 53 |





