








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 324 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 134 matches | ||
| Renown | 98 matches | ||
| Premier | 20 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 40 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3268 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,813 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2242 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2488 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 3694 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 1389 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,597,627 of utility $206 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 42 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | stix | 60% | 45 |
| #2 | Limny ⸸ | 55% | 40 |
| #3 | xXx_Sexlord69_xXx | 55% | 51 |
| #4 | winternet | 54% | 24 |
| #5 | DeanB=) | 54% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | SamSakeR | 50% | 96 |
| #9 | Kat | 49% | 73 |
| #10 | Edw | 48% | 48 |
| #11 | Wouti. | 40% | 42 |
| #12 | Callum- | 40% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kat | 7 | 0.0052 |
| #2 | xXx_Sexlord69_xXx | 3 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | Wouti. | 3 | 0.0037 |
| #4 | w a l k e R R R | 2 | 0.0032 |
| #5 | SamSakeR | 1 | 0.0005 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xXx_Sexlord69_xXx | 180 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #2 | SamSakeR | 162 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #3 | Edw | 115 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #4 | Kat | 112 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #5 | Wouti. | 106 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jamesta | +3.11 | 92 | 60 |
| #2 | Edw | +2.21 | 68 | 74 |
| #3 | xXx_Sexlord69_xXx | +1.31 | 85 | 79 |
| #4 | Sykes | +1.15 | 63 | 52 |
| #5 | w a l k e R R R | +1.07 | 59 | 77 |





