








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1738 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 174 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 162 matches | ||
| Wingman | 121 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 98 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 94 matches | ||
| Faceit | 82 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 22 matches | ||
| Premier | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 133 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




78 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
11321 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 43,698 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 11695 | 27% |
| Smokes | 10568 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 9328 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 12107 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,132,031 of utility $137 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 726 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Salamander | 53% | 133 |
| #10 | honeyhaunts | 51% | 87 |
| #11 | Mr_Manime.TV | 50% | 261 |
| #12 | MegaMatt | 49% | 71 |
| #13 | TrekonBT | 47% | 259 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | discoRyne | 1937 | 0.31 | 57 min |
| #2 | Mr_Manime.TV | 995 | 0.19 | 22 min |
| #3 | dasmako | 882 | 0.17 | 21 min |
| #4 | Salamander | 811 | 0.29 | 24 min |
| #5 | TrekonBT | 800 | 0.16 | 19 min |





