








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 54 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 436 matches | ||
| Wingman | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




31 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4786 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,312 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4969 | 26% |
| Smokes | 6385 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 4243 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 3715 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $637,679 of utility $56 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 215 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eggchan | 56% | 45 |
| #2 | Kirito | 54% | 61 |
| #3 | A Nice Boulder | 54% | 37 |
| #4 | Kai | 52% | 42 |
| #5 | トラックくん | 48% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Kai | 52% | 42 |
| #5 | トラックくん | 48% | 42 |
| #6 | CswBunny | 46% | 97 |
| #7 | nickels | 44% | 136 |
| #8 | Bawas | 44% | 87 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nickels | 8 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | Bawas | 8 | 0.0042 |
| #3 | Kai | 4 | 0.0046 |
| #4 | CswBunny | 3 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | トラックくん | 2 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bawas | 222 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #2 | nickels | 198 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| #3 | Eggchan | 177 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #4 | トラックくん | 97 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #5 | Kirito | 77 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kirito | +1.86 | 83 | 59 |
| #2 | Kai | +1.49 | 76 | 52 |
| #3 | Eggchan | +1.13 | 79 | 59 |
| #4 | nickels | +0.98 | 76 | 50 |
| #5 | A Nice Boulder | +0.50 | 50 | 68 |





