








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 651 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 626 matches | ||
| Wingman | 260 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8950 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,981 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3468 | 23% |
| Smokes | 385 | 3% |
| HE Grenades | 5889 | 39% |
| Molotovs | 5239 | 35% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,537,572 of utility $139 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 304 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | riusamus | 52% | 182 |
| #2 | IngeBob | 48% | 106 |
| #3 | Chyme | 48% | 884 |
| #4 | McChicken | 42% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | riusamus | 52% | 182 |
| #2 | IngeBob | 48% | 106 |
| #3 | Chyme | 48% | 884 |
| #4 | McChicken | 42% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chyme | 14 | 0.0008 |
| #2 | riusamus | 4 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | IngeBob | 3 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chyme | 1873 | 0.11 | 47 min |
| #2 | IngeBob | 226 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #3 | McChicken | 44 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #4 | riusamus | 37 | 0.01 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ππβπ‘πΎΡππ | +0.85 | 83 | 45 |
| #2 | riusamus | +0.76 | 70 | 32 |
| #3 | McChicken | +0.22 | 84 | 41 |
| #4 | Chyme | -0.99 | 56 | 60 |
| #5 | IngeBob | -1.30 | 51 | 55 |





