








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 26 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 6 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
377 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 792 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 195 | 25% |
| Smokes | 114 | 14% |
| HE Grenades | 299 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 184 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $140,549 of utility $156 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 23 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sennin | 100% | 3 |
| #2 | akuku | 75% | 4 |
| #3 | SAD | 67% | 3 |
| #4 | 71 S4DDLL | 64% | 25 |
| #5 | 2184957 | 63% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | 71 S4DDLL | 64% | 25 |
| #5 | 2184957 | 63% | 19 |
| #6 | adsaf;; | 44% | 9 |
| #7 | 亲爱的 | 40% | 5 |
| #8 | ⨯ | 33% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 71 S4DDLL | 1 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 71 S4DDLL | 103 | 0.22 | 2 min |
| #2 | 2184957 | 55 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #3 | SAD | 11 | 0.18 | 0 min |
| #4 | 亲爱的 | 8 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| #5 | adsaf;; | 4 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sennin | +9.71 | 93 | 67 |
| #2 | SAD | +4.51 | 100 | 64 |
| #3 | adsaf;; | +3.61 | 88 | 51 |
| #4 | 2184957 | +2.56 | 68 | 63 |
| #5 | 71 S4DDLL | +2.40 | 75 | 69 |





