








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 81 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 92 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 24 matches | ||
| Wingman | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2675 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,419 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4416 | 36% |
| Smokes | 4224 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 995 | 8% |
| Molotovs | 2784 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $509,923 of utility $74 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 17 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | perx4sale | 59% | 83 |
| #2 | Lofty | 59% | 80 |
| #3 | Jared Garry Bednar | 55% | 97 |
| #4 | ernie suds | 52% | 172 |
| #5 | Waxybro | 51% | 47 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ernie suds | 309 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #2 | Lofty | 212 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #3 | Jared Garry Bednar | 124 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #4 | perx4sale | 110 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | Waxybro | 103 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lofty | +3.88 | 79 | 57 |
| #2 | Bottleopnr | +3.64 | 81 | 40 |
| #3 | Admiral Coffee | +2.38 | 87 | 65 |
| #4 | perx4sale | +2.26 | 62 | 54 |
| #5 | ernie suds | +0.78 | 73 | 46 |





