








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 347 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 73 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 20 matches | ||
| Faceit | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




64 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1889 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,978 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3228 | 32% |
| Smokes | 2511 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2433 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1806 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $487,966 of utility $80 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1754 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ★casey★ | 51% | 74 |
| #2 | GumbyVsDomo | 51% | 55 |
| #3 | It's Almost Harvesting Season | 50% | 94 |
| #4 | Slay3rDog | 48% | 125 |
| #5 | ZER0 | 46% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | It's Almost Harvesting Season | 40 | 0.0215 |
| #2 | One♿Note | 18 | 0.0180 |
| #3 | ★casey★ | 13 | 0.0089 |
| #4 | GumbyVsDomo | 12 | 0.0114 |
| #5 | Slay3rDog | 11 | 0.0046 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ★casey★ | 265 | 0.18 | 6 min |
| #2 | GumbyVsDomo | 168 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #3 | Slay3rDog | 103 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #4 | It's Almost Harvesting Season | 103 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | One♿Note | 61 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ★casey★ | +5.20 | 80 | 59 |
| #2 | ZER0 | +2.60 | 64 | 36 |
| #3 | GumbyVsDomo | +2.41 | 73 | 52 |
| #4 | It's Almost Harvesting Season | +1.14 | 33 | 22 |
| #5 | King Nashir | +0.84 | 35 | 48 |





