










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 59 matches | ||
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
856 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,670 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 461 | 28% |
| Smokes | 701 | 42% |
| HE Grenades | 102 | 6% |
| Molotovs | 406 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $363,992 of utility $145 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Froggy Fresh | 3 | 0.0038 |
| #2 | Brack | 2 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | Sykkelblyant | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | AlqeeNo | 1 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | Whipper Snapper | 1 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sykkelblyant | 538 | 0.47 | 17 min |
| #2 | Sniff | 212 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #3 | Brack | 173 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #4 | Froggy Fresh | 126 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #5 | AlqeeNo | 81 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sykkelblyant | +4.10 | 79 | 77 |
| #2 | AlqeeNo | +2.16 | 75 | 78 |
| #3 | CheesusCrust | +1.31 | 61 | 61 |
| #4 | Brack | +1.03 | 66 | 59 |
| #5 | Sniff | +0.61 | 59 | 45 |





