








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 25 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Ancient | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
490 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,258 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 535 | 24% |
| Smokes | 337 | 15% |
| HE Grenades | 851 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 535 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $357,223 of utility $185 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 25 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Masen | 100% | 6 |
| #2 | shadyb | 83% | 6 |
| #3 | 666PANZERKAMPFWAGEN999 | 52% | 42 |
| #4 | veggeh | 52% | 92 |
| #5 | veggeh if he was mentally retard | 51% | 47 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | veggeh | 280 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #2 | xZimmeBoi ︻芫=---- HöStLoV ^^ | 181 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #3 | 666PANZERKAMPFWAGEN999 | 64 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #4 | Каре́лин | 52 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #5 | veggeh if he was mentally retard | 39 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | shadyb | +8.08 | 64 | 69 |
| #2 | veggeh | +5.50 | 73 | 61 |
| #3 | Masen | +3.47 | 54 | 48 |
| #4 | xZimmeBoi ︻芫=---- HöStLoV ^^ | +3.33 | 86 | 54 |
| #5 | 666PANZERKAMPFWAGEN999 | +2.63 | 81 | 49 |





