








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 9 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 253 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2804 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,821 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5924 | 40% |
| Smokes | 3591 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 3320 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1986 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $853,431 of utility $134 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 5 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Itai | 68% | 22 |
| #2 | D3XTER | 61% | 28 |
| #3 | Koi | 52% | 58 |
| #4 | Failoh | 48% | 207 |
| #5 | DreaM | 48% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Itai | 68% | 22 |
| #2 | D3XTER | 61% | 28 |
| #3 | Koi | 52% | 58 |
| #4 | Failoh | 48% | 207 |
| #5 | DreaM | 48% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Failoh | 7 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | Koi | 3 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | D3XTER | 3 | 0.0055 |
| #4 | Itai | 1 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Failoh | 509 | 0.13 | 14 min |
| #2 | Itai | 199 | 0.46 | 7 min |
| #3 | Koi | 179 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #4 | D3XTER | 56 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #5 | DreaM | 10 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | D3XTER | +1.53 | 75 | 57 |
| #2 | DreaM | +0.96 | 73 | 56 |
| #3 | Billy | +0.53 | 72 | 78 |
| #4 | Itai | -0.28 | 70 | 89 |
| #5 | Koi | -1.31 | 73 | 59 |





